The LuHi Pod
A podcast for LuHi students, families, and our community.
The LuHi Pod
Season 7, Ep 3: Dr Rueter on Post HS Planning as a Christian
Use Left/Right to seek, Home/End to jump to start or end. Hold shift to jump forward or backward.
You're invited to the Post High School Planning Night put on by the LuHi Guidance Department! Everyone is welcome to campus on September 8th at 5:45 pm for this event. Topics include:
- College admissions timeline
- Understanding the FAFSA and financial aid
- Prepping for the ACT/SAT
- and more!
Find more details here: https://www.lhsparker.org/knowledge-base/post-high-school-planning-night-
Today on the Pod, Dr Rueter shares a little about his breakout session topic: How to Prepare for College as a Christian. We discuss why it's important to include faith conversations when we think about launching our kids successfully into their next chapter.
Zoeller and Hannah are at the top of the show talking about substacks and sandwich boards.
Send us your feedback! Podcast@lhsparker.org
Our intro, outro, and segment music were written and recorded by Mr. Matt Zoeller. You can find us on most of the socials under the Lutheran High School handles.
If you have a question you want answered on the Pod, we do Q&A episodes each season! Submit questions anytime to podcast@lhsparker.org.
You can find chapters for each episode and transcripts here: https://www.buzzsprout.com/2228322
Thanks for listening, subscribing, and sharing with your friends!
Compassion humility, gentleness, patience, bear with each other and forgive one another. If any of you has a grievance against someone, forgive us the Lord, forgive me. Colossians 3, 12 to 13. Welcome to the Little High Pod.
SPEAKER_03Well, we are here again, and we are more prepared than ever, maybe, but uh I am more prepared than ever, maybe. Maybe. I wanted to because we talked about this last episode, but I cut it all out. And I was, it should be included.
SPEAKER_06You so we could just use that? Uh sub stack. Oh you have a substack. Come to think of it. You did cut that out.
SPEAKER_03I did cut it out. And I and only because the who's on first stuff was so good.
SPEAKER_06Oh my gosh. The kids, did you hear him quoting us? Yes. All in the hallway. It's like uh learn some math a little bit. Because that's we're not here.
SPEAKER_03Right, just for the jokes.
SPEAKER_06When do we do the uh feedback from people in a text message we got 10 minutes ago segment? Is that now? Now in ten minutes. Okay, one of our fellow listener moms, she's always been a listener. She got a little behind, and she said, until Hannah, I did listen to them all when she was out on maternity leave. You should do more.
SPEAKER_03Thank you. I agree. Are you gonna say who it is?
SPEAKER_06Christina Zieler.
SPEAKER_03Christina, thank you. Shout out to you. Thank you. Christina's awesome.
SPEAKER_06She's a active mother in prayer was on campus today. Amazing. Praying.
SPEAKER_03Thank you for that. Thank you for even more than listening to the podcast. Thank you for praying for us. That's that's phenomenal. Okay. Um, speaking of.
SPEAKER_06And Christina, if I ever have a mullet, you better say it's ugly. Because that's then we know. Now it'll be a camera. You can see it. Friendship is real.
SPEAKER_03Oh my goodness. Okay. Um, you have a sub stack, and that's what I want to talk about.
SPEAKER_06Oh yeah. Let's get into it. What? Okay, you know what? Every time I say to someone what I have a sub stack now, they say send it to me.
SPEAKER_03What is that? Oh, what is that?
SPEAKER_06Yeah, I'm only friends with um, you know, Gen Xers. I can't even what's older than that?
SPEAKER_03Boomers. I don't know. Boomers. Oh, yeah, boomers.
SPEAKER_06Yeah, I'm only friends with boomers. And you. Thank you. We don't need to say that though. Uh yeah, okay, so a sub yeah, a substack is like a blog. Yes. And maybe you can inform me on the difference. And I say the substack is like a blog, except nothing. They just don't call it a blog anymore. Yeah. All the angry moms who had ideas about vitamins and baby raising ruined the word blog.
SPEAKER_03It's true. That is that is true. It's a hot taste. Yeah.
SPEAKER_06Um, a lot of people have them. I've learned by having one. But what is it? Basically a blog. Why do I have it?
SPEAKER_03Yeah, why do you have it? Tell us why you have it.
SPEAKER_06Am I the guest today?
SPEAKER_03No.
SPEAKER_06Oh, good. I have no notes of answer.
SPEAKER_03No, you are the co-host, but we're just interested in your life.
SPEAKER_06Yeah, I've been stacking. It's like a blog. It's a, you know, you write about a whatever. But I've been trying to develop this thing because I have a oh, I don't know, multi-year passion. Almost like 10 years of very critical thoughts and a master's thesis about professional development and what works and what doesn't work. You know, professional growth and even personal growth. And um not that I've like mastered in it, but I've always been interested in it.
SPEAKER_03And you have masters in it.
SPEAKER_06And I have master masters in it. Oh, you're kind of a master. Yeah, so loosely I'm writing a lot about that and trying not to opine too much because I saved that for the podcast.
SPEAKER_03Thank you. Thank you. Yes, we want your opinion here, and we do not share well.
SPEAKER_06And here's an opinion. I don't think people should be opining on Substack. They should do it on podcast.
SPEAKER_03There you go. That's a lukewarm take for another time.
SPEAKER_06Yeah.
SPEAKER_03So basically, if people want to hire you to professionally develop this.
SPEAKER_06I should develop some kind of a mechanism for that. Yes, that would be. Yes, they really, they really should.
SPEAKER_03Um okay. Can we talk about can we talk about one-star reviews and sandwich boards?
SPEAKER_06Oh my gosh, please.
SPEAKER_03Uh, friend of the show. Laura.
SPEAKER_06Friend of the show.
SPEAKER_03Laura from Atlanta. Um she unfortunately, this is not funny. She she was re-rended uh uh maybe a couple weeks back at this point. Everyone's fine. Everyone in the car is fine, and everyone in the car that did the re-rending, everybody's fine. So she had you know, she took it into the body shop, and outside of the body shop in Atlanta, there was a man who was wearing a sandwich. Do you know what a sandwich board is? Yeah, okay, a sandwich board, homemade. It was a homemade sandwich board.
SPEAKER_06He had Can you buy store-bought sandwich boards?
SPEAKER_03Oh, I don't know.
unknownYeah.
SPEAKER_06Maybe. I don't know. They're probably all homemade, but they probably are some homes are more equipped than others for sandwich making anyway. That's neither here nor there. Keep going.
SPEAKER_03He's wearing one and he has written out on it that says the name of the auto buddy shop charges for unnecessary repairs, and he's just pacing the street, just like in front of this auto body shop. He's walking up and down. Oh, yeah.
SPEAKER_06Don't say the name of that auto body shop.
SPEAKER_03They um they're sponsoring the shop. Right, they're sponsoring the show. All the way they're also loyal Atlanta listeners. That's right.
SPEAKER_06Since here their slogan is we only charge for necessary repairs. So a little, I don't know what to make of this.
SPEAKER_03A little discrepancy and then up for debate, uh, which is not what we're here to do. But I just I'm so tickled. Uh, first of all, I'm tickled by one-star reviews. I love a one-star review, just like globally on Google.
SPEAKER_06Just send them our way, people. One-star reviews. All the troubling you can do.
SPEAKER_03If you want to make it.
SPEAKER_06Trouble GPT, you ruined. That's right.
SPEAKER_03I just think they're so funny. Just like when people get really worked up about something at like a pizza shop or something. I just, I, I live for it. It's so funny to me.
SPEAKER_06They can be really funny.
SPEAKER_03So the fact that somebody would like get in their car, leave this auto buddy shop and be like, I'm annoyed. You know what? I'm really annoyed. I'm so annoyed, I'm going back there tomorrow. Not only am I going back there tomorrow, I'm gonna spend my evening making a sandwich board. They do have to know. They have to know. People have to know. Yes. And just the fact he wasn't like, I'm annoyed, I'm gonna get online and instantaneously like leave a review. He was like, no, not good enough. I will go back.
SPEAKER_06You know what Laura should do? She should tell them, hey, for a discount, I will make a sandwich board, follow that guy that says no, they don't.
unknownYes.
SPEAKER_03That would be just so funny. Oh my gosh. I'm sorry, I was tickled by that. Have you ever been? I've never left a one-star review. Have you ever left a one-star review?
SPEAKER_06If I did, I don't think I'd admit it. It would feel petty. Um, I maybe one star, well, a long, long time ago, there was a place where I parked my car there all the time. Huge parking lot. Never went inside because I was going to my friend's house next door.
SPEAKER_04Yeah.
SPEAKER_06And after like three years, they changed owners suddenly and they towed my car.
SPEAKER_03Oh, that stinks. And you left them a one-star review.
SPEAKER_06You know what how long ago that was? That was so long ago that the person who drove me to the impound lot to get my car was pregnant, and her son now goes here. That's how long ago that was.
SPEAKER_03Wow.
SPEAKER_06Yeah.
SPEAKER_03Wow. They had like Google reviews that long ago.
SPEAKER_06I don't want to reveal too much if anyone goes looking for it. You know, but yeah, the internet was out, Hannah. This was when we were blogging. Okay. You know, it wasn't that long ago. But it was not cheap getting that car back.
SPEAKER_03I've never had a car towed. That is one of my I believe it.
SPEAKER_06Yeah.
SPEAKER_03Is there a chance that like you could pull up? This is in my brain, this is what it means to get your car towed. They tow your car, you panic, you race after them, but like you're too slow, and you get to the lot, and your car is like about to just be smashed. Like, if my car gets towed, it will be flattened like that.
SPEAKER_06Customers only. Other parkers will be smashed. We will smash your car.
SPEAKER_03That would be a bad day. Um, okay, so so far we've talked about nothing relevant to our guests today.
SPEAKER_06Just how he would have wanted it.
SPEAKER_03Absolutely.
SPEAKER_06And he prescribed what is. Yeah.
SPEAKER_03Yes.
SPEAKER_06Who's our guest? Dr.
SPEAKER_03Reader.
SPEAKER_06Who's on second?
SPEAKER_03Third. We're at third board.
SPEAKER_06That's on third. What's on third?
SPEAKER_03Uh never gonna get old. Uh Dr. Reader is our guest today, and he is talking about post-high school planning night, September 8th. You guys should all come. It's lots of good information. It doesn't matter what grade you're in, all are welcome. It just talking about college stuff.
SPEAKER_06What that looks like, options and having a game plan going in.
SPEAKER_03Yeah, yeah. Good summary.
SPEAKER_06That could be the tagline. Are they gonna charge for unnecessary repairs?
SPEAKER_03Absolutely they will. It's college. Um okay. So do you have anything nice to say about Dr. Reader, besides he is a sinner? That's a callback to him. Yeah.
SPEAKER_06Uh Dr. Reader has the most interestingly decorated water bottle of all the teachers on campus.
SPEAKER_03That is accurate.
SPEAKER_06Remember when uh we were young, of course, and you would go to someone's whatever, you go to your like your friend's house or ride in their car, whatever, you would flip through their CDs. Yeah. And that would tell you a lot. It would. Right? Of course, we don't have that anymore.
SPEAKER_03Right.
SPEAKER_06Water bottles.
SPEAKER_03Water bottles. It's so true.
SPEAKER_06Dr. Reader represents with the stickers on the bottle.
SPEAKER_03Yeah. Yes.
SPEAKER_06That's all we got for whatever this is. My friend Hannah, the homemade sandwich board maker. This was submitted from one of our listeners. Go ahead and read it.
SPEAKER_03Okay. Um my co-host, the only guy whose bylines are longer than his waistline because he's languid.
SPEAKER_06Long-winded.
SPEAKER_03Long-winded, but also quite skinny.
SPEAKER_06Oh. Oh, you shouldn't have. That's so nice.
SPEAKER_03Hey everybody, thanks for listening to the Blue High Pod. So excited to have our guest who is a returning guest, Dr. Reader, back on the podcast. Dr. Reader, thanks for being here.
SPEAKER_00Hey, my pleasure. Glad to do it again.
SPEAKER_03Yes. You're kind of new. Kind of still new. Yeah.
SPEAKER_00It's only my second year here.
SPEAKER_03Second year. Yeah. And now you're on both sides of it. You're parent of a student here. And yes. Yes, which is fun. Um, okay, I'm kind of still in your thunder. Do you want to go ahead and introduce yourself, what you teach, where you came from, all that kind of stuff.
SPEAKER_00Yeah. So Dr. Reader, uh teach both now junior and senior theology.
SPEAKER_03Oh, I didn't know that.
SPEAKER_00Yes. So they've they've added a wrinkle. So year two, I'm learning a second class.
SPEAKER_01Fine.
SPEAKER_00So it's like I'm a new teacher all over again. Yeah. But sure, why not? Yeah. Uh and yes, as you said, I've I now have we have a high school freshman. Yes, yeah. Uh who just started as we're speaking, you know, where he's at the freshman retreat. So he's we'll see how well that went and see what fun he had.
SPEAKER_03And yeah.
SPEAKER_00Uh but I also have a college freshman.
SPEAKER_03That's right.
SPEAKER_00So that adds which adds some relevance to our conversation today. Where some of these things are on my mind because we're right in the middle of it. So my wife is actually right now in Southern California with our son.
SPEAKER_03Oh wow.
SPEAKER_00Um just take just took him to school.
SPEAKER_03Yeah. Where did he decide to go?
SPEAKER_00Uh he's going to Concordia Irvine.
SPEAKER_03Nice.
SPEAKER_00Um, you know, both my wife and I are alums and she still works. She works there.
SPEAKER_03Nice.
SPEAKER_00I used to teach there.
SPEAKER_04Oh, that's right.
SPEAKER_00So plenty of connections. So like I know I know his math teacher.
SPEAKER_04Yeah.
SPEAKER_00Um, we were undergrads together. That's so so it's kind of that fun little okay, yeah.
SPEAKER_03Yeah. That's awesome. I hope he has a great year, and this is a good segue in our why we're here today. Um, we have the post-high school planning night coming up. It's gonna be September 8th. Um, this is for, I believe all families are welcome to come to this. Um it's really never too soon to get, you know, get ahead and start thinking about what's next after high school. And it doesn't have to be a four-year college, like not every one of our students does that, and that's totally fine. Um, so Denise Nafse is going to be talking about the college application and timeline process. So that alone is like worth its weight in gold. And then lots of breakout topics. We'll have one about the military, um, one about how to avoid overpaying for college, which is what I would go to. Yes, um, prepping for ACT, SAT, all that good stuff. There, there's a variety of things. Um, you guys all got an email about it. It's also now in the knowledge base if you want to reference back, but but please mark your calendars and come to that. And Dr. Reader, the section you are talking about is how is preparing for college as a Christian? Yeah. Is that right? Okay. Yeah. Um, great. So I don't want to, you know, steal your thunder. Everyone needs to come and hear what you have to say about that. But can you just walk us through kind of why is this important to think about or start talking about?
SPEAKER_00Yeah. As a parent, you put all sorts of emphasis in how do you launch your kid into life.
SPEAKER_04Yeah.
SPEAKER_00You know, how do we get from you know, remind like you've got toddlers. Toddlers. You know, I mean, I still I remember mine as toddlers. Uh they don't want me to remind them of it. That's so funny. Uh we got all the pictures up and all that kind of stuff. But um every step of the way through parenting, you're saying, okay, what is the next thing I have to prepare them for?
SPEAKER_01Yes.
SPEAKER_00And as a parent, our biggest picture goal is how can they lead a life that is successful, that they're independent. But as a believer in Christ, one of the key things is am I empowering them to take their faith with them? Yeah. Are they prepared for it? Are they going to encounter things that will blow their minds in ways that they're just, they're not going to be able to deal with.
SPEAKER_04Yeah.
SPEAKER_00And so wanting to be a little proactive about it and think through, so how do we make decisions? How do we encourage conversation in a way that opens things up so that they're not completely stunned, regardless of where they head uh for school, because depending on what you know, what type of a degree they're after, you know, you could ide I could idealistically say, everybody, go to a Christian college. Right. You know, depending on what you're studying, the Christian college might not be the best place for you.
SPEAKER_03Absolutely. Yeah. Mm-hmm. I went to a Christian college. We both went to a Concordia. So but I d after I graduated, I did spend a year at University of Florida in Gainesville, which is not a Christian college. Um, but I had a great Christian community there, and I I think Christian community can be where you find it. So you don't have to go to a Christian college, is I guess what we're saying in this moment.
SPEAKER_00But well, and and and being proactive, thinking about well, what how do you make a decision? How do you and in some sections we'll talk probably more particular on those processes of how do you determine? How do you vet a school? How do you look for what works, what isn't? There's a difference between the marketing that a college puts out and the reality on campus.
SPEAKER_03Aaron Powell Very true.
SPEAKER_00You know, when I worked for one of these Christian universities, you know, the one I'm sending my son to, um I would always tell students, if if I'm having a conversation with somebody, a prospective student, I would just say, if there's a way to get on campus, please do.
SPEAKER_03Yes. Yeah.
SPEAKER_00See it, get a feel for it. Uh there are certain times you get on a campus and you feel comfortable. There's times you get on a campus and go, Well, it looked good in the brochure. Right.
unknownYeah.
SPEAKER_00But I don't know how you took the angle on this shot, but this doesn't feel like the same place. Yes. Or there's just some weird feel to it, and you just go, I don't know.
SPEAKER_03Yeah.
SPEAKER_00You know, what's the community like? What's it? There's all kinds of questions to it.
SPEAKER_03100%. That was my experience. I thought for sure I was going to CSU. And we visited twice because I went and I didn't love it. And I was like, no, but this is where I'm going. So we went back and it's like, okay, it's not where I'm going. That's in, yeah, just just a total feeling thing. I don't know what it was. Um okay, so we talked a little about why this is important to talk talk about, um, why it should be top of mind for parents. How would you as a parent start to broach this conversation with your student? Because they may or may not be thinking about the Christian aspect of my future.
SPEAKER_00Yeah, I mean, I might start with the the things that they're already thinking about. So start where where they're at and then move into it. So it might be, you know, what are your hopes? What are your dreams? Because if it's the kind of a thing where it feels natural to say, well, here's some options that you already know are going to be supportive of your own faith.
SPEAKER_04Yeah.
SPEAKER_00That becomes a different conversation than if you recognize they're going to be going, you know, having having come from California, if they if if the best school for them happens to be, you know, Berkeley.
SPEAKER_04Yeah.
SPEAKER_00There's some things that come with that. And I'm not picking on people that go to Berkeley, whatever, grade school. But there's some philosophical differences in what you're going to receive in an education there than what you would receive in an education, you know, at Lutheran or at another at a Christian college.
SPEAKER_04Yeah.
SPEAKER_00You're going to see something different. It it may also come down to as you're looking at different even Christian colleges. Are you is the worship experience going to be different?
SPEAKER_04Yeah.
SPEAKER_00You know, is the campus life going to be different? You know, my son looked at um Concordia Irvine and he looked at Biola, also in Southern California, where I actually have my PhD from. And he honestly looked at it and he goes, I don't know if he'll appreciate that I'm telling this part of the story, but it's I I he was so Lutheran in this moment. I just loved it. So funny. He's like, so if I'm understanding correctly, if I go to Biola, they require you to go to chapel and they you have to like check in. And I'm like, yeah, you scan a card going in, and he's like, but shouldn't you go to chapel if you want to go to chapel? And I'm going, Oh, you are picking it up as I pick okay, you were so Lutheran in this moment. You know, so he looked at it and for in and he had a moment where if he's theologically thinking it through.
SPEAKER_03Yeah. Okay, so maybe as a parent of a three-year-old, I'm listening and reading a lot about how like basically you have until they're six, seven, maybe like ten, to really uh like lay the foundation of formation. But what you were what the story you were just telling, like it really tells like a foundation was laid um where he was able to stop and assess and think uh critically himself and make a decision on his own. So parents of high schoolers, is it too late? How do we how do you do that?
SPEAKER_00Yeah, it the the di there's a difference between you know what you're looking at, you're looking at probably studies that say, you know, here's the statistics. And you know, thatistics will always provide for you what the norm is and what the typical is, as opposed to what is necessarily going to happen in anyone's given life. You know, that's the former academic of me speaking. It's like you know, because it you know, I had all sorts of I've had all sorts of conversations with people who will say, you know, you know, after a certain time someone is not likely to come to faith in Christ or so forth. And I was like, yeah, but how many people do we know for whom that's not the case? I mean I led a Bible study years ago with a couple who uh became believers in their early 50s.
SPEAKER_03Aaron Ross Powell Oh, interesting. Yeah.
SPEAKER_00And just I mean, they I couldn't give them more information. It was it was spectacular. So it's it's one of those things where i is from a statistical standpoint, would it be beneficial to have those conversations earlier? Sure. If you're looking at it and saying, you know, I I got a 16-year-old and we've never really talked about faith. You know, one, if it's been a part of your life and they've been able to observe it, uh you've been speaking to them without speaking to them. You know, uh when I was doing my own doctoral research, that was one of the things that we that studies that I was looking at that were confirming that uh uh the way in which we um live out our faith uh uh uh helps communicate about yeah you know, and maybe it's the kind of a thing where you look at it and say, well, uh maybe I've not done that. Make the adjustment. Use what time you have. And pray for God to help you for it to be effective. Yes.
SPEAKER_04Yeah.
SPEAKER_00Because primarily, you know, what I do to communicate the faith to my child is really only effective if God is involved in the process. It's completely I'm participating kind of ancillary to what he's doing, what the Holy Spirit is moving.
SPEAKER_04Yeah.
SPEAKER_00And so yeah, I don't panic over it and say, oh no, I missed it. It's oh no, it's too late. Jump in. Yeah. Start having those conversations. Yeah. Understand that your kids might look at you if you know if they're, you know, 16 years old and you're just like, we're going to have a conversation at dinner about, you know, prayer. Uh Dad, this is weird. What is this? What are we talking about? Well, maybe just be honest in saying, you know, this is something that I think I should have been doing, but haven't been. Notice the transparency. It's like they're going to pick this up and say, yeah, but we haven't been doing this. Acknowledge it. Yeah. Okay, I haven't been doing this. Yeah. But I do think it's important. Can can we?
SPEAKER_03Yeah. And even bringing the future in, like, you're not we're not going to be sitting here sitting at dinner for the rest of forever. Like I want to take advantage of the time I have with you. So yeah, I love that. Don't it's not fear-based. Don't panic. No. Yeah.
SPEAKER_00Yeah.
SPEAKER_03Yeah.
SPEAKER_00But but take it, take advantage of the time that's in front of you. Instead of looking at what I didn't do, well, what can I do moving forward?
SPEAKER_03Yes. I love that. I think that's super helpful. Okay. So what are some of the other risks of not thinking through this? If you uh you know send your kid off to college and they've never thought about it, you've never thought about it, what are s what are some of the risks of that?
SPEAKER_00Aaron Powell Well, you might not anticipate what the influences will be. You know, if you know if they're going to it's a possibility, you know, if you have your your church, you have one church background, you send them to, you know, let's say you're very Lutheran and you send them to a very charismatic college, they're coming back with all sorts of things going, what is this?
SPEAKER_03Yeah.
SPEAKER_00You know, you send them to, you know, let's say they're they want to go to an Ivy League school, and you know, they're going maybe they're going into a setting that is distinctly hostile to the Christian faith. And if you've not anticipated it, you've not maybe had the time to prepare yourself for the conversations, to prepare them ahead of time for some of the things they might run into. Um the other thing I would say is is also being able to say, what are some of the questions to be able to ask in the process? Yes, that's good. You know, what are you looking for? You know, if you're if you've not given that piece, that part of the consideration of, well, what's the faith component? You know, maybe it's you know, maybe the best choice for your son or daughter is not a Christian school.
unknownYeah.
SPEAKER_00Okay. What is campus life like for the Christian student? If you've not considered it, you you you're not looking for it, you've not started to lay the foundation for your son or daughter to look for things. Yes. You just maybe think, well, hopefully they'll stumble into it.
SPEAKER_04Yeah.
SPEAKER_00Well hopefully. Yeah. But, you know, I think back to, you know, I was doing youth ministry years ago. Um, I had there was a young lady who was a part of the youth group who wanted to go to UCLA. And I thankfully had some resources to help there. There was another student from the same youth group who was a couple years ahead and already there. And there was also right across the street, there was the University Lutheran Chapel, and I had a friend of mine who was working there. And I said, okay, here's what we're gonna do. Uh, we're gonna meet there.
SPEAKER_04Yeah.
SPEAKER_00And I want you to come, we're gonna walk the campus, we're gonna have lunch with the person that you know from church, and we're gonna have time to have to figure out, okay, so what are the things? What has she learned? How does campus life work? And then I'm gonna introduce you to my friend who she worked for that university chapel, and she did campus ministry, and I said, when you because I want in a sense, I'm trying to hand care of this person off and say, what I've done as your youth leader, this person is trained to do the same thing.
SPEAKER_04Yeah.
SPEAKER_00And she's gonna be able to do it there in this context for you as a college student.
SPEAKER_03Yeah. And that's like that's the body of Christ at work. That's what we're called. I love that.
SPEAKER_00If you think about these things ahead of time, you can start doing the research and start looking. It's like, well, what are what options are there?
SPEAKER_03Yes.
SPEAKER_00You know, I might have the advantage as a church worker, networked with other church workers half the time. I know somebody somewhere. Start having those questions having those have the conversation with your own pastor.
SPEAKER_04Yeah.
SPEAKER_00With your own youth leader.
SPEAKER_03Yes.
SPEAKER_00Hey, what what are the resources you have that could help guide us? Yes.
SPEAKER_03I love that. Because then when you're planning your college visit, maybe you take uh an hour and say, okay, we found two churches that we think would be a good fit for you. Let's just go meet some people. And then if your student decides, like, no, these aren't for me, at least the seed has been planted. Like you should find a church community. Right. Like this is you should do this. This is how we do it, this is what it looks like. So I love that. That's really, really, really helpful. Um so flip side, what are some of the benefits? Maybe we've already covered that.
SPEAKER_00We've kind of talked we've kind of covered it, but it yeah, putting it in their minds, helping them think about it ahead of time. Uh one of the other ones is hopefully they're not completely shocked by things.
SPEAKER_04Yeah.
SPEAKER_00Part of it might be having some of the conversation to say, here's what life has been like for you. Here's some protections that we've had for you that they're not going to be there.
SPEAKER_04Yeah.
SPEAKER_00You're going to hear things from people that you've not heard before. You're going to see things. Now, granted, as a parent, we might come into it and say, ooh, they might be shocked, and they're going, I might know some of this already.
SPEAKER_04Yeah.
SPEAKER_00And then we as the parent get to be shocked, you're going, wait, you're aware of what? Hang on. I don't know that I needed to know that. But there's open again, it continues the open conversation and the dialogue. And if nothing else, in the process, as you're having this conversation, you demonstrate that it's important to you and you help them see it as important to them, then it can be an ongoing conversation as they launch into their college time so that they know, hey, as this is taking place, you know, you can you can follow up with it. You can see how it's going. They might have an encounter and say, well, I tried this church out over here and not what I thought it was going to be. Oh, okay, well, why?
SPEAKER_04Yeah.
SPEAKER_00What what do you think wasn't quite working? What what didn't what seemed odd to you?
SPEAKER_04Yeah. Yeah.
SPEAKER_00You know, to help them process through it. Because uh and one of the realities, I used to I quote used to quote this a lot. Uh there was a uh radio talk show host in Southern California, he's the the Bible answer man, Hank Hanagraaff. But for years I used to listen to his show and he would always make a comment about if you ever find the perfect church, don't join it. There's no such thing. Trevor Burrus, Jr. Right. And that's the thing, is because but if you're coming into it thinking I'm gonna find the perfect church, you're gonna find out that it doesn't exist. And he would actually facetiously say to people, it's like, well, if you do come in, you're just gonna kind of mess it up yourself because, oh, by the way, you're also a sinner. Yeah. And church is really just a collection of sinners trying to do better with each other.
SPEAKER_04Yeah.
SPEAKER_00But maybe some of that conversation, humorous as it might be at times, but it helps us to kind of say, as I'm trying to find what can work, but understanding, yeah, no, it won't be perfect. No, it won't be exactly the same thing. And and maybe you come out, you know, your your son or daughter come out came out of a church with you that just it was great. The worship life was great. There was a youth group that was just fed them. Their experience here at Lutheran was just awesome. Yes. And they take this and say, this is what I want. Yeah. You you might not find exactly that somewhere else, but how can you find enough that is going to care for you spiritually, that's going to guide you in truth, that is going to return you to scripture on a regular basis, and do those key things that maybe it's not the same social connection you had before, or maybe something is not just exactly right, but they're teaching scripture well, they're teaching it right, yeah. And they're helping fuel your faith, maybe at a time when it's really going to be challenged.
SPEAKER_03Yeah. Do you have any thoughts or advice for parents who when their kids go through a prodigal season? Because I feel like college is a ripe time for that kind of experience.
SPEAKER_00Your knee-jerk reaction is to have a knee-jerk reaction.
SPEAKER_04Yeah.
SPEAKER_00You want, I mean, especially if, you know, if your faith matters a lot to you, uh that's that's scary.
SPEAKER_03Yeah, totally scary.
SPEAKER_00You know, again, I look at my own kids and I'm like, I would I that would concern me. Um I've walked with many parents through those seasons where it j it freaks you out. They start saying things, you know. I I I had to walk with a few parents uh in a youth ministry years ago where uh we took kids on an event and and one of them came back and he says, you know, before we left, I was probably an agnostic, but I I think I'm an atheist now. And it's one of those events that you think, hey, this is gonna be a high in your life. And he looked at it and like, this feels shallow and and I and I don't know. And I and I said, can we keep the conversation going?
SPEAKER_04Yeah.
SPEAKER_00Can we keep talking about it? And and I think that's the critical part is internally you're gonna freak out.
SPEAKER_04Yeah.
SPEAKER_00That's okay. What's happening here cannot look like you're freaking out.
SPEAKER_04Yeah.
SPEAKER_00Uh because then your son or daughter is gonna feel like, well, they're just shutting down, well, they're just this, it's just gonna be reactionary. Um find a place to talk through those things that might internally be freaking you out so that then you can continue to have the conversation and be uh just receptive to hearing where are you at.
SPEAKER_04Yeah.
SPEAKER_00Um I think the biggest thing is trying to have a long picture, a long view. That's good. Um they're young. Yes. The likelihood is they have plenty of life yet.
SPEAKER_04Yeah.
SPEAKER_00Um and if you keep the open dialogue and the conversation going, it might be difficult conversations, but it might be fruitful years of conversation that helps to guide them back when they're ready to actually hear and accept again what's going on. But but really the biggest thing is is how do you hear their heart? How do you hear where they're actually at? Some of the time um in in more of a counseling type setting, not that I'm that versed in it, but I used to teach counseling for ministry type classes. Oh, yeah. I've done too many all over things. Um but the presenting issue is not always the actual issue. That's true. So what's on the surface and what they're reacting to on the surface might not be the deeper issue. And depending on your relationship, depending on how much they believe they can be 100% open, it might take time, like watching a flower blossom, it might take time for you to get to the point of them actually saying, here's what's really going on. Here's where the real struggle is. And if they hear and see enough trust and you can continue to keep that trust going, then you're more likely to get to that deeper issue.
SPEAKER_04That's good.
SPEAKER_00And and and the hard part is it maybe that's gonna be months to years.
SPEAKER_04Yeah.
SPEAKER_00I'm trying to freak I here's the intentional. I'm gonna freak you out in that moment and saying it might not be short.
SPEAKER_04Yeah.
SPEAKER_00That's uncomfortable.
SPEAKER_04Yeah, that is.
SPEAKER_00Totally acknowledge that. But keeping that longer vision to say God's not done with them yet, so I'm not done with them yet.
SPEAKER_03Yeah. Yeah. And God loves them just as much more than you do. And he he wants to.
SPEAKER_00I mean, who?
SPEAKER_03Yeah.
SPEAKER_00Who are the people that he was spending so much time with?
SPEAKER_03Yeah. The sinners, the tact the sinners, the taxes. I know he's I always loved it.
SPEAKER_00I was actually talking with one of my classes. Who are the sinners? Oh, by the way, that's us. So Yeah.
unknownYeah.
SPEAKER_03And he's a lot kinder to them than the Pharisees. Yeah. Yeah. So maybe some wisdom from James. Slow to speak, quick to listen. Yeah. Yeah. That's great. Um okay. So can you just wrap up by giving us a little sneak preview of what you're going to cover in the event.
SPEAKER_00Trevor Burrus, Jr.: I mean, really, it's just it's like what are the questions that you need to kind of process through? You know what are the what are the possible things that you should anticipate, you know, when you're making a decision, secular college, Christian college, what are the things that you need to be asking? What are the possible, as we've been talking about a little bit, the pitfalls, the ups, the downs, just really processing through all that kind of stuff and trying to say, how do how do we have the conversation? How do we engage in it? Um yeah, just in the big picture, just trying to look at and say, okay, how can I how can I take as much as we're we, you know, as a parent, you're going to be intentional to say, is my son or daughter going to a school that's going to educate them well?
SPEAKER_04Yeah.
SPEAKER_00Let's look at it from the the spiritual side and the Christian side of it and say, okay, what about their college experience can help to continue to nurture and support their faith?
SPEAKER_04Yeah.
SPEAKER_00Is it the school itself, or what can we find around it?
unknownYeah.
SPEAKER_00And how can we as parents help advocate for and connect them to things that will do that?
SPEAKER_03Yeah. Kind of going off what you were saying, I think what Western Christianity has done really well is campus ministry. Like there, if you go to a non-Christian school or a Christian school, there are robust campus ministries very, very, very close to campus. Like they'll all be within walking distance. Your kid can connect there and they'll have a wide variety to pick from. Is there anything else you wanted to cover?
SPEAKER_00No, I just I would just encourage, even if you look at you look, even if you look at your son and daughter and say, uh, my kid's a sophomore. I do I need to be thinking about this yet? Uh it's amazing how fast this happens. But we're always, as a parent, you're always looking and anticipating. So it's like you might look at it and say, Well, I don't know if I need if you if you're if you're better equipped out ahead of what your need is, why not?
SPEAKER_03Yeah. Amazing.
SPEAKER_00It's just it's an evening. It's I think it's a well worth it. Yes. A great evening.
SPEAKER_03Yeah, yes. Lots of information. Please come. Like we said, it's Tuesday the 8th. It starts at 5.45. I will put it all in the show notes and it'll be correct information, so be sure to check there. Dr. Eeder, thank you so much for your time.
SPEAKER_00You're welcome. Glad to do this again.